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Raphaël Millière

I asked to rewrite Bohemian Rhapsody to be about the life of a postdoc, and the output was flawless.

Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Trapped in a lab, No escape from academia Open your eyes, Look up at the whiteboard and see, I'm just a poor postdoc, I need no sympathy, Because I'm easy come, easy go, Little progress, little stress, Any way the grant money flows doesn't really matter to Me, to me Mamaaa, Just submitted a paper, Put in hours of work, but now it's in review, Mamaaa, my research has just begun, But now I've gone and hit a roadblock Mama, oooh, Didn't mean to make you cry, If I'm not published again this time next year, Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters
Too late, my time is up, Sends shivers down my spine, my brain is aching all The time Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go, Gotta leave this lab behind and face the truth Mama, oooh I don't want to quit, I sometimes wish I'd never pursued this degree at all. I see a little silhouette of a professor, Scaramouch, Scaramouch, will you approve my proposal! Budget cuts and grant rejections, very, very frightening me Galileo, Galileo Galileo, Galileo Galileo, Figaro - magnificoo
I'm just a poor postdoc, nobody loves me He's just a poor postdoc from a poor lab, Spare him his career from this monstrosity Easy come, easy go, will you let me go Bismillah! No, we will not let you go (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go (Let me go) Will not let you go (Let me go)(Never) Never let you go (Let me go) (Never) let you go (Let me go) Ah No, no, no, no, no, no, no Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia, let me go Beelzebub has a grant deadline put aside for me, for me, For meee
So you think you can stop me and reject my paper So you think you can love me and leave me to fail Oh, baby, can't do this to me, baby, Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here Nothing really matters, Anyone can see, Nothing really matters, Nothing really matters to me Any way the grant money blows...
#nlproc
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