Ugh. Woken this morning by a cacophony of birds. Four calling birds were trying their best to out sing another three french hens, and another two fucking turtle doves, literally. Noisy buggers. Another partridge too. This is getting ridiculous. I really need to start looking for recipes. I wonder if my neighbour would like a pear tree, I'm not sure I have space for four.

Perchta is a Christmas witch or monster found in Austria and Bavaria. She is active during the 12 nights of Christmas and, especially, on 6th January. She rewards good children, but bad children are cut open with a ploughshare, disembowelled, stuffed with straw then sewn up using a chain as thread. Perchta will also punish anyone who works on household tasks during the Christmas period and anyone who doesn't leave food and drink out for her. #Christmas #Yule #folklore #weird #mythology #12daysofchristmas #gothic

Ooh three french hens. Excellent. Eggs in the spring! And maybe a roast chicken later in the year yum. But argh. Two more turtle doves. The other two have been making a right racket already. I may be in need of a pigeon pie recipe soon. Again with the partridge. That's three of them now. The pear tree is nice tho.

Today is the 3rd day of #Christmas! Impress your family with the story of how King Jehu once ritually defiled a shrine to Ba'al with a latrine https://toilet-guru.com/blog/51.html?s=mb #history #12DaysOfChristmas

Ooh. A second pear tree. I guess I'm making stewed pears this autumn. A second partridge... I still haven't worked out what to feed the first one. And a pair of turtle doves. I wonder if they eat the same as partridges...

To everything return, return, return
There is a reason it’s returned, returned, returned
And a time for every refund under Heaven

A time to be bored, a cracked die
A dead plant, a time to repair
A dangerous toy that could kill, a loose boot heel
A Tickle Me Elmo won’t laugh, a cracked mug that weeps

To everything return, return, return
There is a reason it’s returned, returned, returned
And a time for satisfaction guaranteed

Genesis: No Return At All

Look at me, you never look at me,
Ooh, I've been waiting, in line, seems so long.
But you're looking through me
Like I wasn't here at all.
“No receipt, there's no return at all.”

The loveliness of Paris seems somehow sadly gay
The glory that was Rome is of another day
I've been terribly alone and forgotten in Manhattan
I'm going home to my city by the Bay
I left my heart in San Francisco
High on a hill, it calls to me
And in exchange I only took your old white elephant

(with apologies to Tony Bennett)